Good News Stories from Parents - A Parent's Story
It’s easy to dwell on negative things when, as parents, we are dealing with serious issues on a regular basis. I wish to share three recent positive experiences. In May 2006, my daughter M was to sing at Autism SA’s 'Art of Self Determination' conference. M had been having singing and guitar lessons but we (parents) had never heard her perform before. I guess it was her fear of strangers and public speaking, which we all find daunting, but is amplified in people with Asperger syndrome. M offered to sing and we were sceptical. She had offered before and had backed out at the last minute. This time was different. As we looked at that confident self- assured young woman holding a microphone in her hand, smiling, and singing, this was an M we had never seen before. And what a performance! Thank you Karl for your coaching efforts and support. Since then M has sung at school in front of her peers and was complimented by them! M is now waiting for her next opportunity to sing.
Then In September 2006 M and I set off to Melbourne. Much to husband’s concern M and I really enjoy flying to Melbourne and especially visiting the shops. However the purpose of this trip was to take M to a concert. M has worshipped the band Placebo with a passion that only someone with Asperger’s could have. Her peers at school had found this level of passion untenable and friends had broken away from her as a consequence (or was this just another excuse). She had been surfing the Net keeping an eye on all the news relating to the band for some time. She informed me the band always tours when they release a new album. Finally the news she was waiting to hear arrived – they were coming to Melbourne. I bought the two tickets and arranged the trip.
M and I had the absolute best time ever. What made this time so enjoyable was that, after a really stressful time, both of us were convinced we were going to enjoy ourselves and we both tried! Here was a touch of empathy! I was amazed to see how confident M was at the concert. Although M would never have gone to Melbourne, or to the concert, alone, or asked anyone of the staff in the motel or shops questions or directions, she frequently moved about the hall, and approached the security guards and asked if she could go in the restricted area to get the best view of her idols. We arrived at 4pm for an 8pm start (she insisted) and she walked about the hall, out of my vision, hoping for a glimpse of the band members. Amazing what a bit of passion will allow you to do!
Lastly, M has expressed a desire to find part-time employment and we prepared a CV together. As we worked our way down the list I was amazed at the number of positive accolades I was able to uncover. I think that as parents we are frequently denied the same opportunities as parents of siblings without Asperger’s (or autism for that matter) when it comes to celebrating our children’s achievements. I was able to list an award for creative writing, a letter from MP Southcott for “outstanding achievement” in the Australasian Schools Science Competition 2006 design chosen for school program cover for a special event, and of course singing. I hope you have enjoyed these stories of positive experiences.
M’s Story: So it all started at 4 am Friday morning. My mother and I got up and left for the airport by 5:30 am and landed in Melbourne around 7:45 am Melbourne time.
We left our stuff at the hotel and spent most of the day shopping, then returned to the hotel for a rest. As we were leaving the hotel for lunch/tea, I couldn't help noticing that a few fans had already gathered outside the Festival Hall (which was just down the road from the hotel).
Naturally, I got all excited and persuaded my mum to lets us wait outside the doors after we ate. So we did. We waited since 4 o'clock, which pretty much meant we waited about 3 hours for the doors to open. It was DEFINITELY worth it though. We heard the sound check! They played “Bionic” twice, “Blind” twice and the “Meds” b-side THREE TIMES! The only lyrics I could catch were "it's hard to see you again". It sounded very awesome.
Finally, at 7:15, the doors opened. They took my camera away though, so no pics *major poutage*. The seats we got were okay, though we were pretty far away and side on from the stage.
So, while the support band was playing, I was trying to get closer to the stage... and I almost got offered a place in the mosh-pit, though the offer got revoked when my ID wasn't convincing enough...
We had to wait a while after the support band finished before Placebo came on, and they finally did at 9:15 pm, playing “Meds” and causing everyone to stand up and cheer. They played so well all night that even though I was standing in a little patch among static people, I still moshed. So by the end I looking pretty battered. It was that sweaty, hehee.
To close, a quote from Brian: "during the holiday season my hair just fell out in clumps, I'm sorry"